CAN I ASK FOR WHAT I WANT?

It’s fascinating how something simple can be perceived as so difficult! Asking for something I want, for example, is among the most difficult challenges in my brain configuration. But, I have decided that brain configurations are not written in stone and even stone can be chopped, chiselled, filed and polished!

On Sunday, we went to a party where a band was playing. Everybody was asked to bring some food. With our bowl of rice-salad and filled tomatos, we entered the party hall. We were expecting the French way, where everybody put his contribution on a large table and everybody then choosing from the table what to have.

In this case, the mainly English participants, had dividing themselves up in small scattered groups and ate basically their own brought food and people talked mainly to the people they already knew.

After having eaten our meal, offering some of it to our neighbours at the table, the band started to play music. We had found a new spot to stand, where we could see the band and listen to them.

I became aware that on the table on my right hand side was a beautiful enormous half eaten chocolate cake. During the course of three songs, I developed an appetite for chocolate and it became the subject of a lot of inner dialogue.

I would be very happy with the opportunity to taste a piece of it... BUT.... and then an interesting list of blockages began:

• " People don’t seem to share their food tonight"
• " I don’t know these people, they don’t know me"
• " Everybody is listening to the band now... no  time for ‘ food’"
• " If I was to ask (very  hypothetically and highly unlikely) how to get their attention over the volume of the music?"
• "It’s in a closed circle of people... I don’ t know who’s cake it is"
• " I am Dutch ( a breed that is usually considered to be far too direct) , they are English.. what will ‘people’  think?" 

In the next two songs, I saw that two pieces were handed over to other English people at another table. And my appetite grew.

I thought about my list of ‘ buts’ and decided that there was little to lose, if I went to ask for a piece.

At the moment, I had no chocolate cake and the worst thing that could happen was that they would say no. The end result would be that I had no cake.. no different to the current situation.

I don’t know them, indeed, changes are that I will never see them again. So even if they think that I make a ‘ faux pas’ (typically Dutch J ), no relationship gets permanently damaged.

So, I decided to give it a go and with a big smile I went into the circle of people saying how attractive the cake looked and if there was any change on having a piece to taste it.

Within one minute, I could tell from personal experience that the cake tasted as good as it looked!

I didn’t only get what I desired: a satisfied tummy and some chocolate cake crumbs as residue..
I also chiselled a fragment of the  stone where it said that asking for something you want is a bad thing. Looking at the stone dust I created satisfied me even more.

Send = receive J